Saturday 3 October 2009 ~ Waxing Gibbous Moon in Aries

Today I received a new book I’d ordered. Crystal Skulls by Marion Webb-De Sisto. I don’t pretend to be an ‘expert’ on crystal skulls, in fact I’ve only just acquired my first one. But I thought I’d read this recommended book to learn how I can use it and also read a little information about the history of the skulls themselves (the ancient ones at least). Anyway, in reading the introduction to the book this paragraph immediately struck me:

Many people think the image or likeness of a skull represents death, therefore, even those created from crystals are disliked or even feared. They are looked upon as the harbingers of ill fortune. I do not feel this way about them. To me, a crystal skull symbolises the truth that death is just a transition to another level of consciousness. The carving process, which the mineral specimen has undergone, changed into a new form. Similarly, the experience of physical death is our metamorphosis into beings of spirit. I also believe crystal skulls lovingly remind us that just as they have been carved from a lasting medium, our true essence was also fashioned from something eternal.
Source: Crystal Skulls, Marion Webb-De Sisto, p14.

Now I have to admit I never was drawn to crystal skulls until recently. I too used to think them rather gruesome and morbid but because my views on death have so changed since being on my path, so too have my views on the skulls. I see them as helpers in understanding our real existence on this earth, storers of wisdom that is eons old. It makes sense doesn’t it? The crystals and stones from which they’re formed was around long before humans were on earth. Think about how much wisdom and information the mineral kingdom contains. Even more so than trees, plants etc. Stones are the ancients.

Sometimes, in my bleakest moments, I long for death. Well, not really death but to escape the haunting pain I’m in. I long to free myself of these terrible and strong feelings of being unwanted, abandoned, self-loathing and guilt. In death I feel I would escape all this but I know too that to be free I need to work with these feelings, understand them, come to terms. I have been blessed with so many tools with which to heal myself. Disappearing into death is not the answer, it is not my time yet. I want to escape but healing will not come from escape…that is denial. To heal I need to confront and work through all these feelings of despair and grief.

I hope my skull, Scaraphina, will help me to do this. Along with all the other wonderful tools I have been so freely blessed with. It is up to me to do the work. Last night I felt utter despair but just in beginning to read a mere book I found some light which has helped me alter my mindset somewhat today. I’ve gone from being totally negative to feeling more positive. I guess I’ve sat on the ‘Woe is me’ bench and am now sitting on the ‘I am Power’ bench. So many synchronous events seem to be happening in my life right now…a chance word from someone, something that I read, a website that I happen to find on the internet – all these things give me gems of information and hope.

Blessings
Deep~Glade

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